Confessions of a Simple Mind.
Okay, so I like Andy. I mean, she's fun, she's funny, she has a killer set of legs and a nice smile and she's well read. She's bright, charming, and while I think she's lacking in a bit of self-confidence, overall I think she's pretty awesome.
And really, I want to screw her brains out.
[sigh]
Don't get me wrong... she has a boyfriend, I respect that and I'm not about to make any advances or plays to get her in bed. And I'm certainly not hanging out with her just because I want to sleep with her... I was a bit worried about that at first, but the feeling is passing. Really, she's the most awesome person I've met since moving to London and I'm petrified of the fact I find her so attractive. I really don't want to mess this up... I have few enough friends as it is. Possibly because I kept trying to sleep with the other ones... who knows? Anyway, bygones... I'm sure she's figured this much out, but I'm going to just motor on and work on the parts of her I like that don't involve sex.
Because, really, as much as I like her (and I do), and I can't say that I have feelings for her... more than friendship, at least. And I don't want "just" sex any more... I mean, yes, I miss it like hell, but I want more. I think I deserve more. And while she is unquestionably good looking (I'd say beautiful most of the time), it really wouldn't be fair to either of us. So I'm guessing this is God's way of testing my resolve... to see if I will stay true to my intent to be just friends and not try and take advantge of the situation (as much as I might want to sometimes).
I'm just lucky that she really is very cool... if I didn't like her this much, things might get messy. As it is, it's TOTALLY worth a bit of lost sleep and frequent cold showers to stay friends with her... she even played Guitar Hero last night! And she was GOOD (for a beginner at least... she'll get better!).
Anyway, enough of that. Just thought I should get it off my mind and onto paper (well... electronic paper). At least here it's harmless... and in a few years maybe I can look back on this and laugh. Here's hoping!
And really, I want to screw her brains out.
[sigh]
Don't get me wrong... she has a boyfriend, I respect that and I'm not about to make any advances or plays to get her in bed. And I'm certainly not hanging out with her just because I want to sleep with her... I was a bit worried about that at first, but the feeling is passing. Really, she's the most awesome person I've met since moving to London and I'm petrified of the fact I find her so attractive. I really don't want to mess this up... I have few enough friends as it is. Possibly because I kept trying to sleep with the other ones... who knows? Anyway, bygones... I'm sure she's figured this much out, but I'm going to just motor on and work on the parts of her I like that don't involve sex.
Because, really, as much as I like her (and I do), and I can't say that I have feelings for her... more than friendship, at least. And I don't want "just" sex any more... I mean, yes, I miss it like hell, but I want more. I think I deserve more. And while she is unquestionably good looking (I'd say beautiful most of the time), it really wouldn't be fair to either of us. So I'm guessing this is God's way of testing my resolve... to see if I will stay true to my intent to be just friends and not try and take advantge of the situation (as much as I might want to sometimes).
I'm just lucky that she really is very cool... if I didn't like her this much, things might get messy. As it is, it's TOTALLY worth a bit of lost sleep and frequent cold showers to stay friends with her... she even played Guitar Hero last night! And she was GOOD (for a beginner at least... she'll get better!).
Anyway, enough of that. Just thought I should get it off my mind and onto paper (well... electronic paper). At least here it's harmless... and in a few years maybe I can look back on this and laugh. Here's hoping!
posted by Marx at 12:07 PM
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